77. Finding New Purpose after Traumatic Loss: with Brendan Shaw

About the episode:

In today's episode, I chat with guest Brendan Shaw about navigating the many complex layers of tragedy and grief, and finding new purpose in life, after a traumatic loss. Since the 2022 murder of his brother, Philip, Brendan has been using storytelling, social media, and community work to process his own grief and help others feel less alone in theirs.

We discuss:

  • Processing his feelings and thoughts through social media, and how his videos have resonated with millions of strangers around the world

  • Exploring healing through small shifts: even 1% at a time

  • Finding purpose in life again after a traumatic loss

  • Dealing with the broken legal system

  • And more

Brendan is the founder of The Phil With Love Foundation, a nonprofit created in Philip’s memory, and creates content as "BrendanShawGrief" on social media that speaks to the often invisible, long-term impact of loss. Through honest conversation and a willingness to share what most people shy away from, Brendan attempts to brings comfort, validation, and connection to anyone walking through life with grief.

Connect with Brendan:

IG, Tiktok: @BrendanShawGrief

Website: BrendanShawGrief.com

Listen on Apple Podcasts | Listen on Spotify

Quotes:

“…even a small shift in mindset can make a huge difference moving forward for somebody. If through this pain I’m experiencing on a daily basis I can give any kind of insight to somebody who’s hurting also, I don’t know any better purpose.”

“Philip was objectively one of the best people you would have ever known. There wasn’t a single person who didn’t absolutely love him. He was charming and funny and witty. He had a boyish, childish playfulness to him…sweet and funny and real and knew how to deliver a stupid corny dad joke at the right time…he’s just the best.”

“When you lose someone really important to you, all of the sudden time takes on a completely different meaning. A day can feel like forever, but then you wake up and you’re like how am I three years into this? I haven’t seen my brother in three years? That’s not possible. He’s right at the forefront of my mind.”

“When you’ve gone through those super low lows, where you just feel like you’re about to die of sadness…but then somehow, you did get out of it…once you do that enough times, you have that repetition – now you have the muscle built where you can maybe start to step outside it and recognize when you’re in the moment and go ‘okay, I have been here before. I’ve also gotten out of this before, and I know that it will happen.’”

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78. Grief Note: feeling stuck in a liminal space

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76. Remembering Poppy Chancellor: with The Grief Gang's Amber Jeffrey